A Holyrood spat that began with a question about seagulls has ended with a government resignation and Douglas Ross insisting he was manhandled in a corridor.
Jamie Hepburn, Minister for Parliamentary Business, stepped down this week after an exchange with Highlands and Islands MSP Douglas Ross turned physical, depending on who you ask.
The clash followed a debate on nuisance gulls, where Ross called for action to stop aerial attacks on his constituents.
Moments later, he claimed Hepburn “grabbed me, swore in my face, and his grip got stronger and stronger.”
Yes, over seagulls.
Ross, a trained football referee known for officiating some of Scotland’s scrappier matches, described the contact in dramatic terms, suggesting it was a serious breach of the Ministerial Code.
Hepburn, for his part, admits to placing a hand on Ross’s shoulder and using “choice words,” but denies anything close to assault.
After a flurry of letters, calls for investigation, and a formal complaint to First Minister John Swinney, Hepburn offered his resignation and an apology to Ross.
Ross accepted both, but not without adding that it should have happened sooner and that the SNP tried to “ride this out.”
He warned that unless swift action was taken, other colleagues might be “exposed to the behaviour I was subjected to.”
What that behaviour amounted to, we may never fully know.
But observers couldn’t help notice the contrast between Ross’s indignation and his day job refereeing matches where players scream, spit and slide-tackle each other without complaint.
“He put a hand on my shoulder and swore at me” might not get a yellow card in most leagues, but at Holyrood, it’s apparently grounds for a government reshuffle.
While Hepburn’s language might not have been parliamentary, his departure raised eyebrows among SNP supporters who viewed the whole episode as a storm in a teacup, or perhaps, a flap in a bird bath.
The original debate, incidentally, was about seagulls terrorising Highland residents, something that remains unresolved while ministers resign and MSPs exchange letters.
So to recap: the seagulls are still attacking, Hepburn’s out of a job, and Douglas Ross is still trying to find a safe way out of the Holyrood building.
